Adventures in Dating - Part 8

Onward and .....upward?.....we'll see. So here's where I tell you how much I really am starting to enjoy this dating thing.....except I still really don't. Before I get into my 8th adventure - I wanna put some things into perspective (for myself).

I mentioned before that I don't really like dating. I feel like I won't meet anyone in the manner that I am, etc. Here are my reasons: I feel like meeting someone online is forced in a way. It's like - here, you can read about me in a profile and we can get matched up based on questions we've been asked by an online dating site and we SHOULD like each other. Yes? Sounds pretty simple. It is. But here's the deal - I just - I don't know. I still feel really uncomfortable that THIS is the way I have to meet guys and go out with them. Do I like being treated to dinner? Yes. Is it nice to have someone genuinely interested in me? Absolutely. But am I genuinely interested in them? I don't know.

Here's what creeps into my mind at times like this - why are these guys on this site? Is it because they're at the same juncture in their life too? Were they're over the bar scene and are pretty busy with their lives that they don't have time to meet someone? Are they more interested in finding someone that "meets certain requirements" they have? Either way - all of these things - those are certainly understandable. But when they're on the site because they don't have experience or don't have "luck with the ladies" so to speak - it shows. And I say it this way for a few reasons. 1. You know which guys those are based on their pictures (that's awful and stereotypical but true). Some people have the opinion that if a guy is on a dating site and he puts pictures up with girls that he's friends with it that's bad - personally - I actually prefer guys that have pictures with friends - both guys and girls - because it tells me he has a good relationship with both sexes and isn't too much of a guy that he can't get the female perspective. 2. When you start going out with them - based on conversations you're having - you can tell that they haven't had that many or any relationships in the past. Of course - out of courtesy they might not be talking about exes or because they aren't sure if you're going to get jealous or whathaveyou. Again - for me - it helps me to see what I'm starting with I guess. I don't know - am I making any sense?

Ok - enough of that tangent/diatribe - onward...

Adventures in Dating - Part #8: Tom
So Tom was another guy I met on the free dating site. He sent me a message. I guess he liked what he saw. His profile and pictures weren't anything to brag about (that's mean but I mean - you're kind of selling yourself on these sites...I mean, c'mon. A little effort?) Nonetheless, I gave him the benefit of the doubt. And we exchanged several emails. Nice guy. Funny. Sarcastic. Similar outlook on things. So we finally agree to meet up.

Date #1
Here's the worst way to make a first impression. Tell a guy where to meet you - but then get confused as to where the place is yourself!

We agreed to meet at a Japanese Hibachi place which has changed names more times than I've changed my wardrobe decisions. So I got there and actually walked in and sat down. Started thinking to myself that maybe he'll think it's the wrong place and leave. So I double check that I have the right place and tell him I'm an idiot, blah blah. Turns out I was at the right place all along. And I show up - he's waiting there. Hah. Good start.

But regardless - we go in - sit down. We're the only ones in there. Which is fine but at the same time kind of weird. I could tell he was a little nervous. And a few times I caught him offguard and his face went all flush. It was kind of cute. He's cute in an unsuspecting way. Like he's not one of those people you'd see on the street and be like - OMG he's so hot - but he's cute.

I thought we might not have that much to talk about considering how much we talked about prior to meeting but our conversation was good and there was never a lull or an awkward moment. It was comfortable and again I felt like I ended up talking most of the time. There was just one moment I thought was a little weird - when he asked me if I was popular in high school. Not weird in a bad way or anything - but just odd kind of. IDK. Whatever.

So after a few hours we walked out. He quasi walked me to my car and was just like "goodnight". Didn't even attempt a hug. Maybe he's shy? Maybe he doesn't hug on the first date. Listen - I don't expect to get kisses from guys on first dates - and I certainly don't openly invite them unless I'm attracted to them - so it's totally fine he didn't even give me a hug. It was just like - I thought - did he not know what to do so he erred on the side of nothing? ha:-) Whatever.

As for Tom - we've since chatted and we both agreed we'd like to hang out again - I feel bad though because both times he's asked so far I've been busy - I suppose if it's meant to be - it'll happen.

My schedule has lessened a bit but this dating more than one person thing is taxing!