Let it float....

"Childhood is what you spend the rest of your life trying to overcome. That's what momma always says. She says that beginnings are scary, endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts the most. Try to remember that when you find yourself at a new beginning. Just give hope a chance to float up. And it will, too..." ~ from Hope Floats

It's the Summer. Summer was always my favorite time of year. No school. Lots of swimming time. Sleeping in. Holidays. My Birthday. Etc.

With each passing year, I worry that I'll lose a bit of my childish ways. Yes. I worry I'll lose that. Fortunately, since I'm working at PSC this season, I probably won't lose that.

If I haven't said it before, my guards are great. They're all really fun kids (they're definitely kids...with a few exceptions)! We have an eclectic group of people and always have a good time no matter who's on duty that day. I like that. I also like the fact that they've been so welcoming to me. It can be difficult to break into a group that's like that. They've all been there for at least two years so they know each other really well. I'm the knew person. It can be tough. But so far, despite the anxiety I have, things are pretty good.

Lately, as I usually do every few weeks, I've been thinking about where my life is at. Am I happy with it? What would I do differently? Will I get a teaching job? Will I EVER move out of my mother's house (please dear lord let this be the first one to be resolved!).

I really do look forward to the day that I can have my own place or share a place with someone. Just having my own space is a godsend. And it certainly helps if I want to have people over. I was thinking the other day how great it would be to have a party for the guards outside of work - but where would I have it? Exactly. I can't have it at my house - not enough room. And I suppose we could try to have it at someone elses house but then it would just be weird. It's probably not the best idea anyway. I am, afterall, their boss. I wouldn't want to get into trouble let alone get them into trouble. Don't ask why I think either of these are possible. I suppose I'll just wait til the guard party to hang out with them.

I'm really trying to take an active interest in their lives outside of work too. It helps them trust me and know that I do genuinely care for their well being. I went to Chris' softball game last weekend. I'm going to Erin's field hockey game next Monday. I'd like to get to one of Nick's baseball games. Hopefully Sara will have some kind of bowling tournament this summer. I'd just like to show them that there's more than just work. Ya know? Obviously it sounds like I could be stretching myself too thin...but I'll make time for it and what's important.

I just hope that I'm doing the right things on a daily basis. I often worry that I'm spending time doing the things that aren't important. I don't want to waste my life going in the wrong direction...but then I suppose every journey has it's benefit and each journey allows us to learn in the process.