Kind of how I am feeling the last two days.....well, since last Friday anyway.
See, this guy that I had met before, ended up being in the group of people I hung out with that night. And I realized, how much I like him. I'm not hoping for anything to come of it - but I definitely wouldn't mind. But - I won't hold my breadth.
As for other things - my friend paul is coming in to visit this weekend - I'm a little apprehensive about the whole situation. I'm concerned he is expecting certain things that just aren't going to happen. I don't know - maybe I'm wrong - but just incase I'm not - I have made plans with as many people as possible this weekend so he and I won't be alone together. Yeah - it's come to that. I'll update is anything does happen - but - as for right now - I am keeping my fingers crossed that things will be normal.
I've been doin' alright with my workouts. I missed last Saturday because Matt was in town - but I have gone every day since then - I even swam 4000 yards last night - which isn't a ton - but I felt good doing it. Hopefully next time I'll have more time to swim longer and get in another 2000 yards. I think I could do about 6000 in two hours, give or take. Tonight I intend on running and then cycling for atleast an hour of each. I'm trying to do at least two exercises each time I work out except on days that are easier. And since I don't know if I will want to get up in the morning tomorrow to work out (since paul will be here tomorrow afternoon) I am going to kick my butt this afternoon. I don't really know if I've lost any weight but I am really going for fitness this time around anyway so it doesn't matter too much. I've been trying to eat healthy and not eat as many sweets and while I do good most of the time - there is still that 20 percent likeliness that I will eat something that isn't good for me. Oh well - I'll get to that point some time.
As for the rest of things - feb and march are going to be busy. England next weekend - then one weekend off - then cheerleading the following weekend - then vegas - then linsday's birthday. BUSY! It's good though - time goes by faster that way.
Honestly - I am glad for the busy-ness - I feel more at peace that way. Oddly enough.
My Schedule for the next two weeks:
Thurs 2/14
work: 8-1:30
Pick up Paul @ 2
work for a bit more
dinner with paul
Friday 2/15 - Sunday 2/17
Paul visits
Monday 2/18
work 8-5
workout 5:30-7
Tuesday 2/19
work 8-5
workout 5:30 - 8
Wednesday 2/20
work 8-5
workout 5:30 - 7
Thursday
workout (am)
Fly to Philly
Dinner with Jackie
Friday
workout
Fly to England
Sat - Monday
England/fly home
BUSY!
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Once you dig in....
You'll find it coming out the other side
And once you dig in
You'll find you'll have yourself a good time
Wake up and shake it, you didn't
make your contribution
There ain't no time for you to spare
If you ain't part of the
game then how can you find
a solution
Nobody said that it would be fair
When the mountain is high
Just look up to the sky
Ask God to teach you
Then persevere with a smile
Yeah yeah yeah
~ Lenny Kravitz
I like music. Ok.....so I really like music. In fact, I am so into music, I generally listen to it as often as I possibly can. I like lyrics. I love the way things just fit some times. I like knowing that there are other people out there that can think the exact same things as me. In a way, it makes me feel less alone. I think that's why I've always been naturally inclined to listen and/or play music as often as possible. I tend to listen to music more when I am sad or feeling lonely - hence...the current desire to listen to it all the time.
I'm kind of at the mindset that things can only go up from here. I've been down lately. I know I am choosing to not do things for several reasons. Saving money is a big part of that - but also because, I don't feel that great about myself.
Things with "you know who" crumbled and not that I expected anything major to come of it - but honestly, and as I've mentioned before, it would've been nice. I'm ready for a real relationship again. I'm ready to face things head on with someone and eventually take those next steps that are a part of life (i.e. marriage, babies, happiness). I still want to be the best person I can be - and obviously - while I'm waiting for those other things, I will continue to strive to do that.....but.....I just want a sign of sorts....to tell me...."hey katie, don't worry - it's not all for naught....so and so is out there for you...and things are going to be great."
A few weeks ago I went out to dinner with my friend Alan. We went to P.F. Chang's - and at the end of every Chinese meal, you know, you get the proverbial fortune cookie. The one I got that night said, "Soon you will be on top of the world." Oh yeah? That's nice. When? Huh? When? Why do those things have to be so freakin' vague! Why can't someone just tell me when it's my turn? Seriously. I try to do all that right things. I try to be a good person. I work hard at my job and I try to be a good friend, daughter, and sister. I just want to know when it's my turn to get the things I deserve?
I guess Lenny was right - "Nobody said it would be fair"
And once you dig in
You'll find you'll have yourself a good time
Wake up and shake it, you didn't
make your contribution
There ain't no time for you to spare
If you ain't part of the
game then how can you find
a solution
Nobody said that it would be fair
When the mountain is high
Just look up to the sky
Ask God to teach you
Then persevere with a smile
Yeah yeah yeah
~ Lenny Kravitz
I like music. Ok.....so I really like music. In fact, I am so into music, I generally listen to it as often as I possibly can. I like lyrics. I love the way things just fit some times. I like knowing that there are other people out there that can think the exact same things as me. In a way, it makes me feel less alone. I think that's why I've always been naturally inclined to listen and/or play music as often as possible. I tend to listen to music more when I am sad or feeling lonely - hence...the current desire to listen to it all the time.
I'm kind of at the mindset that things can only go up from here. I've been down lately. I know I am choosing to not do things for several reasons. Saving money is a big part of that - but also because, I don't feel that great about myself.
Things with "you know who" crumbled and not that I expected anything major to come of it - but honestly, and as I've mentioned before, it would've been nice. I'm ready for a real relationship again. I'm ready to face things head on with someone and eventually take those next steps that are a part of life (i.e. marriage, babies, happiness). I still want to be the best person I can be - and obviously - while I'm waiting for those other things, I will continue to strive to do that.....but.....I just want a sign of sorts....to tell me...."hey katie, don't worry - it's not all for naught....so and so is out there for you...and things are going to be great."
A few weeks ago I went out to dinner with my friend Alan. We went to P.F. Chang's - and at the end of every Chinese meal, you know, you get the proverbial fortune cookie. The one I got that night said, "Soon you will be on top of the world." Oh yeah? That's nice. When? Huh? When? Why do those things have to be so freakin' vague! Why can't someone just tell me when it's my turn? Seriously. I try to do all that right things. I try to be a good person. I work hard at my job and I try to be a good friend, daughter, and sister. I just want to know when it's my turn to get the things I deserve?
I guess Lenny was right - "Nobody said it would be fair"
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
I....AM......JOB
um - yeah - can I just tell you. woah with the tiredness. Srsly. I tried, I TRIED! to get more sleep last night - and I actually didn't wake up at all last night - a nice change from Sunday night where I approximated about 4 hours of actual sleep time.
I looked at myself in the mirror this morning and my first reaction was "damn, that mack truck was WAY bigger than I thought it would be". Yeah.
Anyway - I'm nearly 3/4 of the way through work today - better than yesterday - albeit that's not really saying much. I am BORED with this job - bored with life - bored with myself. BORED I TELL YOU!
The rest of the month will probably go really fast though, which has its ups and downs.
This Friday, an ex-boyfriend from High School who happens to live in Ft. Lauderdale now, is driving up to have dinner and drinks with me. That should be nice - considering I haven't seen him in a few years and we always seem to just miss each other. That'll be good. So I'm taking a half day on Friday (so I can workout since I didn't go yesterday - I'm a loser). I'm working for WinnerComm again this weekend for Dance/Cheer stuff - so no day's off.
Next week - I work Mon - Wed full days - Thursday I am taking a half day because Paul is flying in to visit for the weekend and he'll be here! So I'm excited for that - we plan on doing nothing! It should be great:-)
The following week is kind of the same - Mon - Wed I am working full days then taking off Thursday so I can workout before I fly home that afternoon - I fly up to Philly that Thursday, out to London the next day - in London for the weekend for soccer! and then back Monday night. I intend on taking off on Tuesday to give myself a day to catch up on sleep - I didn't schedule that time in the last time I went to Ireland so I am pretty sure it'll be better this way - and I won't be useless at work.
Then the week I'm back in Orlando (last week of Feb) - I work through Friday but Glenn (childhood friend/neighbor) wants to come down that last weekend in February to play golf and hang out. I think I am going to have to tell him that I just can't do it because I won't be able to take off work. He'll just have to come in March.
And by that time - March will be here! Craziness!
All the while, I MUST keep up with my TEFL course - I really don't want to not be able to finish it - I paid good money for it - speaking of money - I owe Trish rent and I have to put in for an invoice by Friday so I can get paid. Yucky money. HATESES MONEY!
--------------------------------------
As for other things - I've gotten really good with responding to people blindly. Example:
Person: Hey Katie what's up?
Me: Hey - nothing, how're you?
Person: Good, u?
Me: Good.
(also sometimes I'll say - "alright")
Ha - boy do I have them fooled. No one really cares all that much anyway - atleast not the passers-by. My friends do. Is it bad that I don't either?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I looked at myself in the mirror this morning and my first reaction was "damn, that mack truck was WAY bigger than I thought it would be". Yeah.
Anyway - I'm nearly 3/4 of the way through work today - better than yesterday - albeit that's not really saying much. I am BORED with this job - bored with life - bored with myself. BORED I TELL YOU!
The rest of the month will probably go really fast though, which has its ups and downs.
This Friday, an ex-boyfriend from High School who happens to live in Ft. Lauderdale now, is driving up to have dinner and drinks with me. That should be nice - considering I haven't seen him in a few years and we always seem to just miss each other. That'll be good. So I'm taking a half day on Friday (so I can workout since I didn't go yesterday - I'm a loser). I'm working for WinnerComm again this weekend for Dance/Cheer stuff - so no day's off.
Next week - I work Mon - Wed full days - Thursday I am taking a half day because Paul is flying in to visit for the weekend and he'll be here! So I'm excited for that - we plan on doing nothing! It should be great:-)
The following week is kind of the same - Mon - Wed I am working full days then taking off Thursday so I can workout before I fly home that afternoon - I fly up to Philly that Thursday, out to London the next day - in London for the weekend for soccer! and then back Monday night. I intend on taking off on Tuesday to give myself a day to catch up on sleep - I didn't schedule that time in the last time I went to Ireland so I am pretty sure it'll be better this way - and I won't be useless at work.
Then the week I'm back in Orlando (last week of Feb) - I work through Friday but Glenn (childhood friend/neighbor) wants to come down that last weekend in February to play golf and hang out. I think I am going to have to tell him that I just can't do it because I won't be able to take off work. He'll just have to come in March.
And by that time - March will be here! Craziness!
All the while, I MUST keep up with my TEFL course - I really don't want to not be able to finish it - I paid good money for it - speaking of money - I owe Trish rent and I have to put in for an invoice by Friday so I can get paid. Yucky money. HATESES MONEY!
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As for other things - I've gotten really good with responding to people blindly. Example:
Person: Hey Katie what's up?
Me: Hey - nothing, how're you?
Person: Good, u?
Me: Good.
(also sometimes I'll say - "alright")
Ha - boy do I have them fooled. No one really cares all that much anyway - atleast not the passers-by. My friends do. Is it bad that I don't either?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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