"Do yourself a favor....don't ever play poker"

Is what my boss/supervisor/mentor at Cabrini told me the other day. It was the same day that I did horribly on the second practice Praxis test. I don't hide my sadness very well it seems. Honestly, I think I do, but when it comes to people that I know will care, I don't. No one else, besides my friends, knew of the frustration I was having all week. Especially no one at work.

So here's what's happened since Wednesday:

Thursday I went for a run in the morning. It was hot! But I'm glad I ran outside. I went to work and learned that the Board Members at PSC want to change like - a lot of things that will create a very dangerous environment at the club. Needless to say, it's kind of up to me to save it. Ha. That's a post for a different time. After work I went to class - where I was all prepared to give my lecture presentation but some stupid woman just got up and changed the order of who was going to lecture in class. I was pretty pissed - especially since I had my presentation all set up from the get-go. Yeah. Not a happy camper after class. After that, I got home and walked into my house - chilled and decided to meet up with a few of my guards later that night at Scoogi's in Flourtown. Thursday nights is karaoke and/or trivia - we were all excited for trivia but because there were too many people there - it was just karaoke all night. But I sang! Haha my head guard and I sang an Eminem song (The Real Slim Shady of all songs...haha). I couldn't stop laughing. It was a fun night. The day ended much better than it had began.

Friday was a new day. I woke up - went to spin class. Went to work. Did some stuff and then decided it was just going to be a nothing doing day. When I get back on Sunday I will be extra motivated. I felt really good after spin class - and then a few hours later I felt really hung over - ha - I only had three beers! But - I went to coaching in the afternoon. The last for the year and there weren't many kids there - so it was fine. I got home and had dinner. Shortly thereafter I got a phone call from Paul! He was home! So I went over to his house for about a half hour - saw him - chatted - etc. His family is having a family reunion this weekend so I didn't stay long - but I just wanted to see him. I missed him! Besides, deciding to leave early was a good decision because I wanted to get a good night sleep before the Praxis today.

Here's the crazy part:

So I'm hanging out - on facebook - checking email - waiting to go to bed. And the doorbell to my house goes off. It's four of my guards from PSC. Yes. They showed up to my house. [[Backtrack a bit: Earlier in the day at work, they all found out I had never seen Mulan. So they felt it was their duty to come over and watch it with me. And that's just what we did. It was the most unusual and interesting situation I've ever been in. Oh, did I mention they were all guys?]] I was just as surprised as anyone would've been. I really didn't expect them to come here. I guess I know better from now on. Ha. Well, its a funny story to tell anyway. They were all so cute too - they dressed up thinking they were going to meet my mom and stepdad. haha - it was pretty funny. I don't know whether to be embarrassed or flattered that they wanted to come over and see me. Haha. It was one of those moments you know you'll never forget.

As for today - I'm just chillin' until 9 or so - then I'm going for a short run - shower - and review a bit of the Praxis stuff. I need to figure out exactly where I go for the test. It's in Conshy - I'm just not familiar with 100 W Maple street. So. Yeah. I'm going to take my test - and then I'm supposed to go to my cousin's graduation party - but I actually found out on Thursday that my final project for my Education class is due on Tuesday. So. Yeah. I have to do homework when I get home. Fun. And then I work tomorrow. Good times.

Anyway - fingers crossed for me! I'm going to need it!

My Nerdiness Reigns Supreme!

Hokay - major XF fan - if you are not - don't click here!!!!

OMG you guys! OMG! YAY:-) Happy times:-)

Anywho - back to reality. Currently "aunt flow" is in town - definitely not smile times for me. meh. I hateses when she comes to visit - but alas, an inevitable factor in being a woman. The monthly reminder that "haha!" no matter how much you work out - you still have a week where you will be mad because you have to sit at home with a heating pad on your back and get all emotional and stuff. BLAH! I can always feel when it's coming too - it's those days when it's THAT much harder to get up in the morning and that much more difficult to get through a work out - those are the days before it hits then WHAM! On my butt for at least two days. No fun.

Back to nerdiness - this is so cool! Robots are completely awesome. Just as long as, you know, they don't build one that's life size without a chord (and it always comes back to The Office!) because it could take over the world that way (oh dwight schrute).

And who wouldn't want a robot to open a beer for you!? Beer opening robot!

And going back to my FAVE show - who isn't excited about my future husband receiving these honors:-) HEART!

Finally - I think I am going to sign up for this Tri for the end of June - Baldwin Park Tri. I should be in shape by then! All things being what they are and that I remain healthy.

Elsewhere - life is kind of bleh. Work is bleh for the moment. I'm going to VEGAS next week which should be fun. Looking forward to experiencing it - as I have never been there. Also looking forward to seeing my seestar:-) I miss her.

Deja Vu all over again....

So, I had another vivid dream - this time - about things that have been on my mind for awhile now.....only, it seems to be REALLY bothering me - atleast that's what the dream interpretation says. And my horoscope today - sheesh - said this:


Dreams continue to be a big part of your life today, Katie. It is likely that you have been having some unusual ones lately, and you can't help but wonder about their significance. Why not go to the library and check out a book or two? You may be fascinated by what you discover. And remember: dream interpretation is an art, not a science. Do your research to get a general idea about the meanings of things rather than trying to do a direct interpretation. If you're really curious, seek out an expert.

So here's my dream:

I was at work - it was a relatively normal day wearing one of my typical outfits (btw, this was in color). Where I sit is in an office away from a lot of other main areas of the building - and for some reason - I walked back to my desk to find a bunch of Starbucks coffee cups sitting around with people's names on them - mine was sitting at my desk with my name and a heart underneath it. Then I see my desk facing in a different direction but also seeing a bunch of people sitting there looking at something on the internet. A guy I used to date (and also work with) was sitting in my seat. He currently works and did work at Starbucks (second job) which is where I assumed all the coffee came from - and the heart - well - he obviously wrote that on mine. So he next thing I know is this guy's best friend (who doesn't work with us) walks in and says, "Just friends huh?" - and the guy goes, "No, what - why do you think that?" The next thing I know - this other guy, who I had been seeing up until recently (who does work with us), comes up from behind me as I start to say "Well that's what his myspace says". Then he responds with "so YOURE the person who looked - I was wondering who checked out my page!" And I said, "only once...." but before I could finish my explanation - the "new" guy had his arm around me and was pulling me out of the office saying "Yeah, just once - now she has to go".

So we walk out of the office and I think it's rather unusual because A) we're at work and he NEVER shows me any kind of PDA when we're there (in fact most people don't know we had even been seeing each other) and B) I just assumed he didn't like me anymore because he hadn't talked to me since about two weeks before - so - yeah.

So anyway - we're walking out of the office and he has his arm around me and he starts whispering in my ear telling me and asking me things like "So you're checkin' up on him huh? You still like him? No you don't. I know you don't."...then he continues without me being able to answer - at this point hes directly behind me and is still whispering into my ear (very seductively) and continues with "Are you moving? You're not going to move. You still like me? I know you do - cause I can tell." And as hes doing this - he starts to put his arms around me and kind of pushes himself into the back of me (sorry for the vividness) - mind you our clothes are on and we're at work. the next thing I know - we're back to back and he flips me over (kind of like a dance move) - and I can see myself saying "Stop stop! What are you doing?" But the whole time he's doing that its happening in slow motion and I can't help but start crying because he's not listening to me. The effect that he is hoping for is playful but I don't like it because I have a skirt on and the flip makes it come up. The next thing I know he lets go and I have fully flipped and am now on the floor on my back with my skirt up around my face - trying to hard to pull it back down (still in slow motion and still crying) - no one seems to notice until just as I FINALLY am able to get up and run out the door and saying "why did you do that!?"

The next scene is me outside on the steps of what reminds me of a high school campus or the steps in front of a big library on a college campus. I am sitting there crying and my best friend from elementary school is there and she consoles me. And I find it funny because I haven't seen her in more than 10 years but for some reason she doesn't question it - she just accepts us as still friends and is there for me. She helps to calm me down. I introduce her to one of my new friends and sure enough - my new friend doesn't even ask me how I am because she is on the phone with HIM and I can hear her talking to him about the situation.

As I sit there for awhile I realize I need to go back into work and I am really embarrassed. All I can think is what do I do and can I forgive him for that? I soon find out that he was told to go home by his boss and that is how he was talking to my friend on the phone - he was driving home.

All I remember after that is how embarrassed I felt and whether I was going to do anything about it. And how hurt I felt that my new friend wasn't really there for me.


SOOOOOOOOOOOO

What does this all mean?

Well since the online interpretation doesn't really handle stuff like this - I kind of made my own conclusions about it:

So I believe that the reason I was dreaming about the guy I used to see was because just yesterday I noticed he became single again - and he was kind of on my mind. As far as the new guy being in my dream - he's been on my mind ALL week. I am really frustrated with him. I think the whole whisper and pda stuff is just an inside emotion telling me I wish he and I were more because I know how much I like him. With the whole him doing stuff to me and me not wanting him to do it - that's kind of unclear but as far as the whole slow motion thing - the internet guide said if you see things in slow motion signifies that i am presently going through a hard time and experiencing great stress in my waking life. (true). As far as seeing my oldest best friend - probably something that tells me real friends will be accepting no matter what - and I was looking for someone to comfort me without question or reasoning - just someone to be there and let me cry. As for the whole part where my new friend was talking to HIM instead of consoling me - I think it refers to the jealousy I have in regards to their friendship - he tells her things that I don't know - so - I get jealous and I feel like she would choose him over me.

I dont know - but I am DEFINITELY going to the book store to get this figured out!