A few questions....

Welcome to the new week people!

Did you like my video blog? I'm not sure if I'll do another - even though I said I would.

So my friend Heather and I have been talking a lot lately about how wonderful it is to have friends and family that care but at the same time, sucks because they think they're helping us with the comments they say.

Take for example - Heather was at her grandmother's 91st birthday celebration yesterday (woo for long life genes!) and she told me that most of the day she had tears in her eyes because everyone in her family kept asking her why she didn't have someone special yet? And how she's such a wonderful person that it's a shame for it to go to waste.

A few things I that I have issues with on this: 1. I totally get how she's feeling. It happens to me all the time with my family and some of my friends who I haven't seen or talked to in a while. 2. Why wouldn't it be okay for her to be a wonderful person on her own? Is she still going to waste to her friends and family? 3. What makes you think it SO EASY to find someone out there?

Heather, like me, has tried and feels as though she's exhausted her options as far as dating goes. Online. Check. Speed dating. Check. Mixers for 30-somethings. Check. Random setups. Check. Social bump-ins. Check. You get the point.

We went out on Saturday night and both agreed in our conversation that everyone else seems to make it look so easy. So my questions are as follows:

-Is it REALLY that easy to find someone?
-WHY MUST PEOPLE CONTINUALLY MAKE US FEEL BAD FOR HOW WE'RE LIVING OUR LIFE WHEN WE'RE TRYING TO DO THE BEST WE CAN? (I'm lookin at my mother on this).
-If it really IS that easy, what's wrong with me that I haven't been able to find it?

I watch a whole lot of dating shows - Tough Love, 'Why Am I Still Single?, Millionaire Matchmaker - to get some ideas as to what I might be doing wrong when it comes to meeting someone. For the good majority, I've changed a lot of how I approach guys. I used to get very physical way too soon.

I was talking with my dad about it yesterday and he asked me - of all the guys that are currently my 'friends', do any of them fit my ramifications? I explained to him that they do - but the thing is - I don't want to sleep with any of them. Because he made the argument that if I'm looking for someone who's 'just like my dad', then I should have a nice selection, right? That is a good point - HOWEVER - I don't want to sleep with my dad....so I don't want to sleep with these guys. Make sense?

More questions:
-Do people think it's comforting to hear, 'but you're so wonderful, I just wish you'd find someone already'? And why is it okay for you to judge me based on my marital status? ('oh you're a single 30 year old, you must have issues' - NEWS FLASH - WE'VE ALL GOT ISSUES!)
-Why are we SO emphatic about people needing someone else? (more of a philosophical question)

Because the truth of the matter is - I want to find someone. Just because I'm still single doesn't mean I don't want to find anyone...it means I haven't been able to. And of the ones I supposedly have, there's no physical chemistry. I want to share my life with someone. I want to have a family and start a new chapter with someone. I do. I really and truly do.

People tell me I'm not open to it. I don't know how much more open to it I could be. I've even toyed with the idea of doing online dating again...if only it didn't cost anything.